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Creating Successful Leaders

Few people “make it” in any profession or position without a little help. We stand on the shoulders of those who came before us and receive support from the people around us–bosses, co-workers, and outside mentors. In my career, I have benefitted from several different “teachers,” who have lifted me up as I aimed to improve myself and my work. I didn’t take that for granted, and I’ve tried to also raise up others through mentoring.

Every job comes with its own set of challenges. If you’re lucky, you’ll start your position with a few contacts and some basic skills, but if can be difficult to distinguish yourself from a large pool of talent. Young professionals, in particular, do not have the benefit of having experienced an industry for a decade or two like their superiors. Mentoring others provides a unique opportunity to fill in the gaps for these workers and offers many rewarding benefits:  

1 . Better Outcomes and Relationships

Mentoring, like tutoring, is an interpersonal skill. When people feel their voice is heard and being encouraged to grow, they are much more likely to remain engaged with their work and voice concerns more confidently. Any time you can foster better feedback from your team, the stronger the team becomes.

2. Reputation

Building a reputation as a mentor in your industry can become a distinguishing part of your career. Often, companies seek to draw upper-talent from pools of candidates that are known in professional circles to be helpful leaders and actively collaborative. Mentoring your employees demonstrates both of these skills easily and clearly, particularly for mentors who’ve done so throughout their career. As the adage goes: “You get back what you put in.”

3. Professional Development

Just because someone can benefit from the guidance of a mentor doesn’t mean they’re without skills to bring to the table. New workers, especially young people, often come with the proficiencies or strategies needed to approach new technology or use new software. You can take advantage of the personal relationship you strike with your mentee to have them teach you how to effectively use these tools. You both walk away more competent.

4. Networking

Life is long and careers often take unexpected twists and turns. The analyst that started at your company five years ago may quickly rise in the ranks of the industry to a sector you’re interested in doing business with or simply learning more about. The more people you can foster a mentoring relationship with, the wider you cast your net across the next generation of leaders. These relationships may end up among the most important in your working life.

5. Personal Fulfillment

Any teacher can attest to this last benefit. Mentoring is an opportunity to open yourself to others whose perspective may be entirely different from your own. Learning from one another about subjects that extend beyond the scope of your job will enrich you personally and professionally.

Mentoring others is essential to bridging the gap between generations of workers. Stepping up to help guide colleagues through this process will not only reward your mentee and yourself, but your industry as a whole. So take a leap and share what you know!

MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS® DISCOVERY (AND DEEPER DISCOVERY) LICENSED PRACTITIONER, AND FOUNDER OF UXL. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE.

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Overcoming Self-Criticism; a blog post by life coach Margaret Smith

If you’re reading this today, know that you are more than you realize. You are smarter, you shine brighter, and you touch more people’s lives than you know.

Far too often, we do not recognize our own self-worth. Many of us are our own worst critics. Even if we accomplish something great, we tend to pick apart our performance, looking at the blemishes instead of the bright spots. But what does this achieve? Sure, it’s helpful to learn from mistakes, but it is absolutely NOT helpful to put ourselves down, be overly critical, or tell ourselves we’re not good enough or capable enough.

An article by Psychology Today discusses our tendency to be tough on ourselves, saying, “Often we self-criticize on autopilot and need to wake up and realize the damage we are doing.” Absolutely.

Start paying attention to that little voice that tends to run through your head. Is it usually negative or self-deprecating? Do you often tell yourself that you can’t do something, or that you’re not accomplished enough to do something? Do you have difficulties accepting compliments or recognizing a job well done? I call this little negative voice your “gremlins,” those self-saboteurs that make you doubt yourself and your abilities.

How do you banish these gremlins? How can you become kinder and more forgiving to yourself?

This involves a fundamental change in perspective, and THAT does not happen overnight. If you’ve been putting yourself down for a long time, it’s going to take a while to lift yourself up. And you’ll probably have good days and bad days along the way–days when you feel confident and brilliant, and other days when your impostor syndrome is strong and you doubt yourself at every turn.

But this shift in perspective is not impossible. Try starting with any of these suggestions:

  • Remind yourself that no one is perfect (and holding that impossible standard is not healthy or realistic).
  • Recognize your achievements (Think about something you’ve accomplished recently and give yourself a pat on the back.)
  • Accept compliments (Simply say, “Thank you” instead of shrugging off the compliment.)
  • Treat yourself how you strive to treat others (Would you constantly criticize a friend? Would you repeatedly put down your co-workers? Probably not! So, don’t do this to yourself.)
  • Learn to let go (Everyone makes mistakes and it doesn’t help to fixate on them. To move on, try journaling about the situation, go on a long walk, talk about it with a trusted listener, throw yourself into a healthy distraction, such as painting, exercise, cooking, or whatever engages and energizes you.)
  • Stop comparing yourself with others. (People often put their best face forward, especially when it comes to social media. Stop comparing yourself to impossible standards and place your focus on self-growth and affirmation.)

Most of us would benefit from being a little kinder to ourselves. This isn’t an act of hubris, but an act of genuine care and compassion. Yes, we need to learn from our mistakes, but we do not need to beat ourselves up in the process. Be more forgiving and patient with yourself, and make a conscious effort to banish those gremlins. Your life will be better for it.

MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS® DISCOVERY (AND DEEPER DISCOVERY) LICENSED PRACTITIONER, AND FOUNDER OF UXL. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE.

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Man sitting with head in hands on a leather coach with blurred section to the left of the frame

Life can get to be a lot. We juggle work with family commitments, volunteering, household chores, and trips to the gym. We get sucked into the little dramas happening all around us, as well as the big national (and international) issues that crop up. For some, escaping means turning to their phone and scrolling (and scrolling and scrolling) through social media. But that’s not a true escape. In fact, social media can make you feel even worse than you already do.

How can you alleviate all this pressure and stress? How can you truly take a step back from life’s chaos?

I suggest taking an intentional break.

An intentional break is different than mindlessly scrolling through Instagram or watching TV. Instead, it involves purposefully stepping away from work or tasks to recharge your mind and body. It could be a short walk outside, a mindfulness meditation session, or even a brief chat with a colleague. Or it could involve something more sustained, such as a weekend getaway, vacation, or even a sabbatical.

These types of breaks of breaks are vital for your mental, emotional, and physical wellbeing. They allow you to temporarily tune out the noise, gain some perspective, and have a chance to reflect. You might discover during this downtime that something you’re currently doing (whether minor or major) is the wrong choice and it’s time to course correct. Or you might realize that you’ve been neglecting the things that are most important in your life (your health, your family, the hobbies and activities that uplift you and bring you joy).

Even if you don’t have a “grand epiphany” while engaging in your break, this time is still valuable. It can help you rejuvenate, relax, and reset your nervous system. We are not built to go, go, go without stopping, and prolonged breaks are part of the natural “pulse” of being human.

Some ideas for short-term meaningful breaks include:

  • Going on a walk or hike
  • Meditating or practicing yoga
  • Finding a quiet space to read a book
  • Nature watching (or people watching) from your window
  • Gardening (or browsing a garden center)
  • Strolling through a conservatory, zoo, or museum

Some ideas for longer-term breaks include:

  • Planning a road trip
  • Booking a stay at a cozy cabin
  • Engaging in a long-term meditation or yoga practice
  • Going on an international vacation
  • Taking a sabbatical
  • Pursuing a new hobby or re-engaging with an old one
  • Attending a silent retreat

There is no right way to take an intentional break. Do whatever fits with your circumstances and interests. And if you don’t think you have time for this type of break, keep in mind that taking the occasional break is essential for your health and can help you refocus and move forward with greater intention and energy.

MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS® DISCOVERY (AND DEEPER DISCOVERY) LICENSED PRACTITIONER, AND FOUNDER OF UXL. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE.

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